Full Moon Party?

I admit that the full moon party in Thailand was one of the highlights on the itinerary; attendance at one of the biggest parties in the world, cheap drinks, topless Australian backpackers, what more could I ask for? Yes I even bought a bright neon coloured full moon party t-shirt and was psyched for it.
To escape the crowds and enjoy the afternoon before the party started we decided to go see the North of the island which was said to be beautiful and a lot quieter. Taxi: 600b one way, Motorbike rental: 150 for the day... doesn't take much to guess which option we went for. So off we set whizzing across the island, up and over huge hills which made for absolutely stunning views over the shimmering water, and being sat on the back I could enjoy the ride. We were just slowing down when passing the 'multi-purpose' port that we came onto the island at when we hit some sand that was lightly covering the road and skid, and I'm told the brakes locked and all too soon my night of boogieing became this:

Luckily we toppled over just outside a clinic, and so whilst the group of men who were sat a couple of metres away from us sat back and chuckled without any move to help get the bike off us or get us up, a woman on her scooter beckoned us down a side street and into a small  room that smelt faintly of antiseptic. Laughing at us she proceeded to torture us with iodine and kindly stuck cotton wool balls to our scrapes. Worried about the cleanliness of the application and the wounds themselves that were still visibly dirty, we were relived when she took us to the nearest major clinic where they patched us up and sent us away loaded with antibiotics. Next problem: the bike, and how to get it back. We had only rented it for the afternoon and so had to get it back by 8, by the time we'd finished at the clinic it was getting on for 7, so we were hopping around a little as there was no way that either of us were in a fit state to ride it back to the shop. Plus, how much do you give to a woman whos just helped peel you up off the road, rescue your bike and take you to the clinic? Not to mention the 'free' bananas that her husband had bought us.

By the time we got back to the guesthouse I was exhausted and in no mood to start drinking, but we pasted on the rainbow facepaints and went off to get our 'free' carb liner dinner and buckets included in the price of our accomodation. Several Vodka and Redbulls later I still wasn't feeling it and left the group to go see what else was on offer. Dodging past girls spewing in the road, and keeping my freshly bandaged toes and knee safe from stummbling drunks, I found the main beach which was packed with people bouncing away to club anthems, I went back to find the group, this wasn't something I wanted to tackle on my own.

Being stone-cold sober at one of the biggest parties on earth is an experience, and not a particularly pleasant one. You notice far more than when your eyes are blurry and the music gets to your head. You see the girls being held against the wall by sleazy older men, or the group of friends who were pushing one girl from person to person to stop her from collapsing, pouring drink down her throat and laughing. You see the large number of police and army representatives with their flashlights checking for drunk use, and, on one occassion, see them arresting someone. Drug use or possession is a serious crime in Thailand even for foreigners, and Thailands prisons are notorious for being some of the worst in the world. Caught with drugs you risk life imprisonment or even face the death penalty.

The full moon party becomes an excuse to grope and prey, I had countless men come up to me with smooth lines such as "you've got huge tits, can I feel them?", some weren't so polite and just went in for a feel; breast, arse, in for a kiss, anything goes. I had to get out of there. By this point I'd lost Jamie in the throng of people and couldn't just go home without looking for him so I got myself up high, on a bridge leading to the balcony of the bar that we were heading for to regroup with others, surely he'd find me here or I'd see him.

Suddenly I felt some arms around me, someone pulling me off the ledge I was standing on, I turned to have this guy shout in my ear to be careful and pointed to where I had been standing, this man was wrestling this Asian girls who was wilding fighting him off, she started scraming a shrill high-pitched scream, was he trying to rape her what was happening? Then the girl next to me started screaming and started hitting her boyfriend was desperately trying to calm her down, and another girl and another... hang on, was this a flash mob? Am I supposed to start screaming too? The guy who had dragged me away was looking just as perplexed and we went to find another seat on the bridge. He gave up on me after I explained that yes, in fact my friend was male. Apparently that puts guys off.

I saw him! I saw him from the bridge and raced down the stairs as quickly as my bandaged leg would let me, I was mentally begging him to stay where he was, I read once that women are far better at telepathy than men and this was definitely the case, assuming of course that I'm any good at it, as by the time I got downstairs and across the beach to where he should have been and he was nowhere to be found, I walked a small loop before heading back to the bridge. Drat! After a couple of hours I could see the sun begining to break through the night and decided that enough was enough and headed back for the guesthouse, hoping that any monsters of the night would take pity on an injured girl. I wasn't back ten minutes when there was a knock at the door and I opened it to find and equally tired Jamie sat on the doorstep. With the sun now fully risen it was time for bed before dealing with the cost of the bike in the morning and catching our ferry onto Koh Tao ready to start diving.